Breaking News: Guy At Breaking Point with Pseudo-Intellectual on Broken Down Train
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Right now, at this very moment, a guy is sitting in a train that has broken down somewhere on the Hurstbridge line. He has somehow become engaged in a conversation with somebody he has strong suspicions could be a pseudo-intellectual. Some girl. With every sentence his new companion speaks he grows ever-annoyed. This person is talking about postmodernism but is using it only as a buzzword. Same goes for functionalism, structuralism and post-structuralism. This person, too, is pretty damn hot.
This person is name-dropping intellectuals but understands little. This person pronounces the T in Foucault and the Ls in Baudrillard. This person also seems to confuse the word 'causal' with the word 'casual'. God, are those lips naturally that sublime?
The guy is wondering how he managed to get into a conversation with this person on this carriage on this broken down train. When is this train going to get started? He shouldn't have been so friendly, noticing that the pseudo-intellectual was reading a book he was also reading. A girl who reads Bourdieu is always trouble.
Perhaps if she wasn't so damn pretty. If only she wasn't so stupid.
And now she's leaving syllables out of words. Phenology for phenomenology; moderny for modernity. The guy is pissed off. As much as he is being choked by her phony intelligence, she has the cocksure beauty of someone who never needed to learn about Ulrich Beck. But she's getting no concessions.
This person is talking about some theory of hers. Some grand universal theory of everything. It fails even the basic tenets of academic enquiry. Yet, she is transfixing.
"So, can I have your number?" she says. The guy is surprised she hasn't somehow brought this up via Pythagoras.
He is staring too deeply into her eyes, disappearing into the split-second that has space for considering that perhaps her pseudo-intellectualism would be tolerable, if only she would get a little closer.
"Yes, of course" the guy is replying.
Man, she probably pronounces the P in pseudo. The guy is wondering if the girl is that hot. He shall see.
"
posted by Daniel @ 11:45 PM
8 comments
8 Comments:
Dude, I've already told you. If you use italics, my browser can't read them.
But, yeah, I have a lot of pseudonyms on the table, for the express purpose of making fun of people. She was hot, but the real life one wasn't a pseudo-intellectual. Just a journalism student. Or something.
Figures she would be a journalist student. But not all us journalist are pseudo intelligent. ;)
I don't want your terrorist browser. Just don't use italics, mo fo.
The real girl wasn't a pseudo intellectual either. It's fake. People tend to forget this.
What the fuck, Age? Do you think I just burned those photos of you after a while? Dude, they are still blackmail-able.
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
No, that was me deleting my own comment. The network fucked up and I accidentally posted the same thing twice. There's no censorship on here. That's why I'm letting you on here, fucko.
Hey, Cunt. Stop being such a Cunting Bastard. You consumerist cunt.
What's with people posting ad in comments now? such bullshit. but anyway, hedger, nice story man.
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